A Day In the Life – Höstdagjämning

Happy ȝevelengðhe!


03.00 – Wake up with dislocated shoulder and hand on left hand side, take half an hour to take morphine, try to whisk circulation back into it.

03.45 – Begin to fall back to sleep

08.30 – Woken up by alarm, fail to wake up, but take morning medication (10mg slow-release morphine, 75mg slow-release diclofenac.

09.30 – Woken up by alarm, fail to wake up. In a lot of unspecified pain that makes me very comnfused

10.15 – Wake up, back pain begins, start screaming at nobody.

10.23 – Make it as far as the quick-release morphine. Take, dislocating wrist in process. Fall back to sleep without relocating.

11.08 – Wake up twisted into an ouroboros, or a moebius strip, or both. Wrist still fucked, back even worst.

11.30 – Right shoulder luxates and doesn’t go back. Remains out for the rest of the day, getting intermittently more painful.

12.00 – Take laxative. The next couple of hours are censored for graphic depiction of faecal disimpaction. Luxate several ribs and pelvis in process.

14.00 – Return to recording. Sore head. Mystery sublux in foot which doesn’t go away.

[forgot to record a few hours because sore head turned into a mini-migraine]

17.32 – Spasms in right shoulder start, after making a pot noodle. Forget to eat pot nodle.

17.33 – Right wrist luxates. Reset by mechanical force.

17.51 – Back pain back up to a 9. Lie very very still. Possibly sleep.

19.15 – Get up with resounding CLONK of vertebrae.

20.46 – go to work, taking morphine and two glasses of port in the process. (All times now approximate)

20.50 – Luxate right hip whilst working. Reduce.

20.55 – Luxate left wrist and thumb whilst working. Reset.

21.00 – Luxate left shoulder, leaving me with zero shoulders. Reset badly.

21.30 – Finish work, wash up. Hands cramp and freeze in the water, multiple finger and wrist luxations.

21.41 -Left patella luxates.

22.57 – Shoulder pain on the right gets so bad that the chest goes into spasm, taking the clavicle with it. Debate diazepam, but decide against it because it’s horrible.

23.15 – Mysterious gut pain. Realise that I’ve not eaten all day, but have had no appetite anyway. Decide on orange juice.

A Day In The Life: Holi

00.00 – Happy midnight! And happy Holi. Close enough to the equinox. Lying in bed watching TV with a dislocated shoulder and both hips subluxed.

01.40 – Fall asleep.

09.30 – Alarm goes off, wake up. In enough pain that I can’t move, think, or get fully conscious enough to roll over and turn off alarm and take medication. Drift, getting more and more panicky.

09.38 – Twin bell alarm clock winds down. Identify that the pain is mostly in my lower back and hips. Take 15mg slow-release morphine, 75mg diclofenac.

10.11 – Wake up, in pain, after strange dream. Relocate wight wrist.

10.12 – Try to sit up to take pressure off right hip, which is subluxated. Shooting pains across pelvis and down right leg.

10.17 – Start hand-typing essay, right wrist luxates more than once per minute for the next hour as I work. Throat probably too sore and creaky from previous day’s morphine to speech-to-text effectively.

11.35 – Call grandparents to say hallo since I miss them. Dislocate shoulder whilst holding phone up to ear.

12.00 – Call pharmacy to check that my prescription, due for delivery today, is on the van. Not only is it not on the van, but it’s not even back from the GP’s. Told I’ll get a call back later.

12.46 – Get call back, pharmacist will deliver my medication by hand at 5.30 tonight. Once again, a fuck-up higher up the chain has put them out.

13.05 – Right wrist dislocates. Reduce with manipulation. Takes a long time, hurts a lot.

14.01 – Right shoulder still dislocated.

14.02 -Reduce right wrist.

14.06 -Strange crunching noise in lower back, whooshing sensation, feel a bit better.

14.18 – Attempt right shoulder reset, fail.

14.19 – Reduce left wrist.

14.20 – Right radial end of clavicle reduces, right glenohumal still a bit wrong. Right scapula moving.

14.29 – Tip of thumb spontaneously reduces, having been luxated at some point previously.

14.30 – Left medial head of clavicle starts migrating upwwards, making eyes water.

14.41 – right hand completely freezing, wrist still dislocated, pain shooting up to disloceted shoulder. Decide to try making a hot water bottle.

14.45 – Get up to make hot water bottle, shooting pains in right leg and back.

15.08 – Sit back down after eating, pain in lower back at lowest ebb so far today. Right leg feels like it’s trapped in a vice.

15.17 – Move downstairs, dislocating left shoulder in process.

15.36 – Mystery chest pain, which may or may not hve had anything to do with my shoulders both still being in pieces.

15.51 – Chest pain subsides – Possibly a luxated rib? Hands freezing cold, despite it being warm.

16.00 – Left shoulder starts reducing itself, hurts like hell.

16.23 – Right hip falls out of socket. Start losing consciousness.

16.51 – Prescription arrives, with no axsain and a note saying “Re; Capsaicin. Needs to see doctor.” I roll my eyes that they are worried about prescribing me chilli sauce. I phone the GP, and the receptionist tells me I need to book an appointment. First one available is the 8th of April, no phone appointments possible. She suggests that she can get a tube to me by tomorrow morning, when the pharmacy will be closed, and asks me to phone her back before seven to check that she’s actually done so. I am not filled with confidence.

18.49 – Drifted, until being woken up by by still-luxated right hip. Took morphine syrup.

20.08 – Rapid luxation and reduction and luxation again of right hip. Whole right leg is rotated outwards to the point that the foot almost points backwards.

21.59 – Took laxative in attempt to lessen pain in lower back (sometimes this works)

22.08 – Luxate both patellae whilst on toilet.

22.12 – Horrible chest pain starts up again. Suspect it’s luxated ribs. Back pain continues getting worse anyway.

22.14 – Right clavicle rotates forwards, luxating radial end.

23.00 – Retreat upstairs with sewing.

23.19 – Hands lock up, decide to rest.

00.00 – Realise that I’ve spent most of the day basically flattened by fatigue, confusion, exhaustion and unable to keep track of what’s been going on. Shrug shoulders, call it a productive day anyway.


Happy assorted spring festivals!

A Day In The Life: Late as ever

I’ve been such a mess of anxiety this winter that I’ve managed to miss the equinox, Christmas, and New Year as days for DitL, so I’ll do it on the day we’re closest to the sun instead (2nd of January).


00.00 – Happy Not-an-equinox-but-the-day-that-the-earth-is-closest-to-the-sun!

01.45 – Right hip luxates momentarily, starts hurting more than everything else.

3.08 – Take herbal sedative, evening morphine, diazepam, dicofenac.

3.13 – Right hip pain increases.

4.00 – Fall asleep.

09.30 -Woken by post. Go downstairs to collect parcel, find that it’s only letters. Luxate hip in process.

09.40 –  Return to bed, suddenly both fatigued and full of pain-based adrenaline. Fail to get back to sleep, but must fall asleep at some point.

11.50 – Woken by post again, this time it’s the parcel. Limp downstairs in already terrible pain, again.

12.00 – Broken fibula starts twinging badly whenever I move. Establishes that, despite everything, it’s still broken.

14.01 – Go for a shower. Collapse onto shower seat, both shoulders luxate. Attempt and fail to reduce both.

14.05ish – Attempt to wash hair, fail.

14.28 – Get out of shower with much difficulty, get into bed. Hips, back and shoulders absolutely burn.

14.30 – Intense back pain overrides everything.

14.42 – Right wrist luxates. Immediate reset.

15.04 – Right shoulder luxation. Scauplua wings suddenly. Feels like clavicle is climbing up throat. Lie down flat on back.

15.08 – Left wrist luxates. Partially reset, lie back down. Switch on electric blanket.

16.00 – Wake up, must have fallen asleep. Right hip absolutely screaming. Take morphine.

16.40 – Apply TENS machine to lower back. Read instructions for homework.

17.14 – Right shoulder still winging. Dislocate right wrist trying to reduce it.

17.15 – Attempt to reduce right wrist, fail.

17.26 – Right knee goes off like a bottle rocket.

17.34 – Right elbow interacts with power pack of electric blanket whilst typing, luxating the lateral head of the clavicle on that side. Pain shoots down through the whole chest.

17.35 – Realise that half of the rib are subluxed on the right hand side, from the spasms. Despair.

17.44 – propped up on one elbow. Right shoulder completely collapses in on itself.

17.53 – Back pain turns over again so that everything feels like radio static on a cold night.Debate taking more morphine.

17.56 – Left wrist luxates, whilst typing. Doing homework.

18.49 – Achieved nothing, right wrist luxates painfully again.

19.04 – Went downstairs to feed dog. Pain across both shoulders, fatigue and racing heart. Exhausted upon getting back upstairs.Luxated right wrist whilst washing dishes.

19.21 – Whole right leg goes into spasm. Consider morphine again.

19.39 – Head starts to hurt, teeth feel too sharp. Definitey need morphine, but also very sleepy and don’t want to take it. Feel a bit useless due to having done no homework, and just watched Netflix all day.

20.09 – Right wrist needs reducing again.

20.13 – Right glenohumeral spontaneously reduces itself. Had not noticed it was wrong, due to all the clavicle and scapula pains.

20.14 – Stabbing pain through from base of scapula, making it difficult to breathe.

20.48 – Reduce a load of finger luxations. Shoulder pain continues, breating still a challenge. Takes the morphine.

21.21 – Left wrist luxates whilst making curry. Hip pain also gets terrible.

21.25 – Shoulder pain returns when I sit down.

22.03 – Luxate jaw whilst eating curry. Eating curry with a spoon, as hands not “together” enough for chopsticks.

22.57 – Reattach jaw.

23.13 – Right wrist luxates again and won’t reduce. Back, hip and knee pain too much to keep awake, plan to go to bed and lie down with an audiobook.

A Day In The Life: Persephone’s Boat Trip

00.00 Happy midnight, happy Mabon. Fell asleep soon after in a morphine haze, trying to stop the pain in my back from making me throw up.

07.30 – Wake up, realise that right shoulder is dislocated.

07.40 – Fall back to sleep.

10.05 – Wake up, shoulder still dislocated. Attempt to reduce.

10.12 – Left hand begins to hurt mysteriously. Take morphine.

10.14 – Try to repair left hand, somehow manage to make it worse.

10.17 – Freezing cold pain shoots up outside of palm and into last two fingers. Go looking for a hot water bottle.

10.18 – Dislocate hip walking downstairs, fall, jar spine, lie at foot of stairs feeling sick and dizzy.

10.25 – Reduce hip, as well as possible, stand up, go and find kettle.

10.41 – Nearly spill kettle on self as filling hot water bottle. Sublux both wrists in the process.

10.56 – Retreat to bed, switch on TV.

11.08 – Back pain reaches the point where I just surrender. Lie flat on back, close eyes, rest arms by sides, start crying.

11.30 – Drifting in and out of conciousness. Realise that the only reason I’ve not noticed left clavicle problems is because right clavicle is having the same problem.

12.00 – Must have been “out” for quite some time. Take more morphine, let myself sink into the dark.

13.10 – Woken up by right scapula trying to climb around to front of torso. Take more morphine.

13.15 – Right glenohumeral joint fails, takes series of movements to fix.

13.28 – Back pain and wrist pain collectively “top over” into nothing but static. Vomit into pint glass.

13.32 – Realise that right wrist is completely dislocated. Reduce with opposite hand.

13.49  Back pain starts to get towards being vomit-worthy again.

13.50 – Right shoulder falls apart.

14.09 – Right shoulder still in pieces, spasms continue across whole back.

14.11 – Loud crack from right shoulder, shoulder falls two inches, arm stops moving.

14.12 – Pain in left hand blossoms up forearm and down fingers. Palm goes numb. Despair.

14.35 – Managed to sit upright. Right elbow starts hurting. More diazepam.

14.38 – Amazing spasm across trapezius that makes my back look like really impressive.

14.55 – Right glenohumeral pop, right scapula continues journey around front of body.

14.56 – Left glenohumeral pop, shoulder falls, probably all a result of the benzo taking effect.

15.01 – Something horrible is happening at the radial end of my left clavicle. Maybe the whole thing is rotating. Good thing the ceiling is fascinating.

15.28 – Forced upright by promised arrival of quotes for double glazing. Dislocate both shoulders, possibly a few ribs, feel sick and dizzy, fail to put weight through both feet. Using crutches.

15.47 – Fallen to pieces, returned to bed, feeling very sick and sore all over. Unsure of being able to get to the Party meeting tonight.

15.59 – Realise that my wrists have stopped hurting. Hooray!

16.10 – Wow, dizzy. Time to lie down. Spasms everywhere, guts don’t feel fantastic either.

16.46 – Drugs seems to be working. Very relaxed and passive and cuddly. Back is still sore, but mostly just want to curl up with someone nice, even more so than being in less pain.

18.55 – Back pain returns. Forced to move, and thus to eat. go to Labour meeting.

21.52 – Return from Labour meeting, in which I basically fell to bits but was not keeping track of exactly how.

21.53 – Get can of Relentless in one last attempt at waking up, go for a shower.

22.02 – Left hip subluxes whilst sitting still.

22.17 – Clavicles both pop, which I think was them returning to “normal”.

22.41 – Intense burning pain in back of neck, lie down and stay down.

22.59 – Lying on left shoulder, shoulder fully dislocates. Have to pause film and take ten minutes to repair it.

23.18 – Give up on being in bed, get in shower in attempt to be warm and less in pain.

23.20 – Assorted pops and clicks whilst in shower, mostly spine, ribs and shoulders. All seem to be going in the right direction.

23.46 – Pain in wrists start up again.

00.00 – Start of the next day, still awake.

A Day In The Life: Midsummer Fire

00.00 – Happy Midsummer! Time for another Day In The Life

00.04 – Right shoulder is extremely stiff and sore, decide to have a shower to ease it off.

00.22 – Exit shower with subluxed hip. Stretch back into place by pacing, then sit down in bed. Refrain from morphine, trust in falling asleep soon.

00.23 – Back pain spreads across hips and up spine. Lie down, attempt to sleep.

02.30 – Still awake, back pain horrendous, take morphine, try to sleep again.

04.46 – Wake up, right shoulder subluxated. Set it, turn over, sublux left clavicle and AC.

05.30 – Back pain still increasing, manage to fall asleep.

09.00 – Wake up, both shoulders subluxed, reset both and sit up.

09.46 – Whilst sitting at computer, full dislocation of left shoulder. Back pain enough to merit morphine on its own.

09.52 – Right shoulder joins in with left shoulder, refuses to reduce. Right wrist spontaneously reduces, was apparently subluxed all along.

10.15 – Right shoulder goes into spasm, taking ribs with it. Take diazepam to stop it.

10.42 – Phone call to plan going out today with best friend. Feel a bit ill, but want to be up for it.

10.56 – Is this the start of a migraine? My ear is hot and half of my headfeels like it’s full of blood and wasps.

11.59 – Yes. Right hip, back, right shoulder also in intense pain. One eye streaming. Nosebleed.

13.13 – Sudden spasm across both sides of back cause me to fall face-first into Dearest’s crotch, mid-conversation. Blacked out, awoke to find him playing Minecraft and using my head as a table.

13.30 – Left hip sublux drops me to the floor whilst wandering through the kitchen. Screaming.

15.13 – Right wrist sublux. Popped back into place under its own strength.

15.48 – Fall over whilst going up stairs, due to migraine. Every time I stand up, I get dizzy. Sit down and stay sat.

18.00 – Realise that right hip paradoxically both hurts and is numb. Feels neuropathic. Pain and numbness spreads to knee and over arse.

18.21 – Right wrist starts to cascade, repeated subluxes in various joints every couple of minutes.

18.35 – Right shoulder starts to burn.

19.40 – Cascade stops.

21.43 – Right shoulder finally dislocates. Relocated with the other arm. Back pain gets worse, and merges up with hip/arse pain.

21.46 – Migraine continues, now feeling very dazed and sick.

22.50 – Migraine seems to be subsiding. Still feel very sick. Teeth hurt. Left eye feels heavy.

23.00 – Give up on the day, decide to go to bed.

Escape from Beltane

0.00 – Midnight, 26th of March. Happy Not-actually-an-equinox-but-close-enough, me!

00.21 – Off to bed with a sore back and 20mg of morphine.

01.35 – Wake up with left shoulder subluxed. Repair.

3.11 – Woken by back pain, left shoulder subluxed again.

04.49 – Woken by left shoulder sublux, realise right wrist is subluxed whilst repairing it.

06.30 – Woken by alarm. Inventory – Left shoulder totally disassembled (ended up sleeping on it), right clavicle subluxed at both ends, right wrist dislocated and immobile, hand cold. Repair wrist and shoulder, sling right clavicle, back to sleep.

07.24 – Woken by back pain, both in slipped discs and pelvis, which feels like it my have an internal sublux. 10mg morphine, morning medication.

09.12 – Must have fallen back to sleep, woken by left shoulder dislocating. Pain in right hip starts up with a vengeance.

10.01 – Right wrist subluxes whilst typing.

10.40 – Right wrist dislocates whilst cooking breakfast.

10.42 – Right hip subluxes, causing fall and dizziness/confusion, whilst cooking breakfast.

11.21 – Right wrist subluxes and goes into spasm whilst eating breakfast. Back pain becomes noticeably bad again.

11.35 Right wrist subluxes again, corrected by snapping it back under its own power. Back pain bad enough to consider morphine, in order to get through errands.

11.57 – Right shoulder “drops” whilst sitting up from chaise longue – Glenohumeral separation, trapezius goes into spasm. Take morphine, consider diazepam.

12.00 – Right wrist sublux whilst opening morphine bottle.

12.30 – Right hip sublux in shower.

13.01 – Back pain intense enough to cause crying. More morphine, prepare to leave the house.

13.09 – Right glenohumeral joint. Shrugged back into place.

13.24 – Back spasms whilst at osteopath.

13.31 – Full clavicle dislocation on left hand side whilst at osteopath; manipulated back into place.

13.56 – Full left shoulder dislocation, due to wearing a heavy jacket. Left it dislocated for remainder of trip out.

14.22 – Wrist sublux, right, whilst waiting to see optician.

15.06 – Back pain necessitates brief break in getting eyes tested.

16.15 – Pelvis and hip sublux, with spasms, on the way home. Reset via good muscle control. Lots of pain.

16.34 – Nearly vomit from back pain.

16.35 – Distracts self from back pain by manipulating dislocated right wrist and dislocated left shoulder. Neither actually reduce the dislocations. Hurts more.

16.59 – Right thumb joins the party, due to holding a spoon.

17.24 – Left hip has evidently been wrong for some time, whole left leg is numb and can’t move. Time for more morphine.

17.39 – Left hip still fucked to smithereens. Right shoulder has fallen out and joined it.

17.53 – Right hip has also subluxed, whilst seated. Attempting to rearrange legs to make the pain less bad has been a bit fruitless.

18.14 – Jaw subluxes, spontaneous.

19.01 – Wrist sublux, again, right wrist. Resets easily. Left hip is still out of socket, an intense stretching pain. Back pain getting worse despite the morphine.

19.26 – Episode of back pain, wrist sublux whilst reading. Resets with some difficulty. Numb feet.

19.30 – Left shoulder apparently still wrong. Ow.

19.35 – Right wrist sublux due to typing.

19.39 – Left shoulder becomes worse. Medial head of clavicle crawling up throat, adding to vague all-over nausea.

20.11 – Right glenohumeral dislocation, needed manhandling back into place. Left still disassembled.

20.33 – Subluxations inside cubit of right hand whilst typing. Much pain. Hot water bottle needed to even think about attempting reduction.

20.50 – Slid down chaise longue, subluxed coccyx. Not currently able to reset it; will need assistance later.

21.09 – Right wrist fully dislocated, making problems in cubit worse. Back pain horrific.

22.15 – Right wrist dislocation, various subluxes in the same cubit.

22.47 – Hip dislocation when standing up. Promptly sat back down.

22.48 – Mysterious grinding and cracking of the neck. Intense pain, sudden silver and red stars, dizziness.

22.52 – Second neck crackle, intense shooting pain all the way down back, suddenly feel better.

22.56 – Left wrist had apparently been dislocated for a while. Fixed with a snap. Sudden shock and pain.

22.57 – Overwhelmed with back, hip, wrist and shoulder pain. Going to bed.

A day in the life.

Inspired by @LittleMissBendy, here’s a day’s worth of subluxations. It’s been a fairly light day – Not tried to do much other that sit on the settee, watch TV, and read a little bit, due to a long, knackering week. On a day where I’d tried to do anything, I’d have had more. It’s also the winter solstice, so I might do this again at the vernal equinox, then midsummer, then the first day of autumn.

Anyway, happy solstice, I should go to bed.

00.00 – Midnight, 20th December. So, this is the entire record of the 21st of December 2014. Happy solstice, me.

00.34 – Jaw subluxations, whilst eating salmiakki. All small, all popped back in without needing to be manipulated.

01.10 – Full dislocation of left shoulder, due to “Hanging” on shoulder (Resting on elbow without using muscle tension to stay up, resulting in a lot of tension through the shoulder girdle). Needed massage, opiates, heavy manipulation to reduce.

2.30 – Bedtime. Sleep amazingly well,

10.00 – Wake up, and inventory the night’s injuries; Two shoulder subluxations, right wrist subluxed. Reset all upon getting out of bed, very little resistance from anything.

11.20 – Pain in hip starts. Reset right wrist sublux, but it doesn’t stay reset. Decide to ignore it.

12.17 – Hip subluxation, with horrendous back pain

12.51 – Hip subluxation resolves itself; Loud CRATCHUNCK noise, silver stars.

13.04 – Wrist subluxation becomes full dislocation.

13.09 – Realise that right shoulder has subluxed again, scapula has crept around to side of ribcage.

13.10 – Left radial end of clavicle is wrong, and hurts. Clunks back into place. Realise that whole shoulder and neck area is wrong on both sides. Very tense and very sore. Morphine time.

13.39 – Right wrist sublux. Hand very numb and very weak, popped back together, but cold and not working well.

14.02 – Right wrist, full dislocation,

14.13 – Hip hurt and unstable again. In stretching it out, managed to pop ankle.

14.15 – Left wrist subux.

15.01 – Left shoulder went to pieces, including a couple of ribs. Lots of pain and thus fell asleep.

18.06 – Woke up, still in pain, still in pieces. Reduced left shoulder (Much pain, much force needed), gently tried to reduce ribs, only semi-succeeded.

18.10 – Noticed right wrist, reset wrist with other hand. Took several steps and was incredibly painful.

18.11 – Right scapula starts creeping towards the front. More sore and stressful than immediately painful.

18.18 – Left thumb DP joint repeatedly subluxes.

18.30 – Lying on left hip, realise that position is pulling it out of joint. Subluxes.

19.01 – Left shoulder, pops back in comparatively easily, hurts enough that I get very lightheaded though.

19.04 – Eating fried bread, jaw subluxes again. Right wrist subluxes, pops back in by cracking it. Now have a screaming headache. More morphine.

19.23 – Right patella slides off and sideways. Popped back by hand.

19.54 – Left foot goes into spasm, takes a few minutes to work out that the problem is a sublux in the ankle. I hate feet.

20.08 – Horrendous back pain, ankle still not sorted.

20.20 – Left shoulder sublux, clavicle crawling up my neck.

20.36 – Right shoulder sublux, scapula and radial head of clavicle involved, mostly just the glenohumeral joint though. Popped back under own steam.

20.41 – Pain in right hip becomes completely disabling, lose ability to do anything other than shift uncomfortably and make pained noises.

20.48 – Return to conciousness.

21.32 – Medial clavicle (right hand side) comes off, out and forwards. Debating whether it’s bad enough for hospital, since breathing is awkward.

21.56 – Right shoulder reuced a bit, right wrist still very, very fucked. Got a hot water bottle on it, and letting it settle.

21.58 – Wrist kerthuncked back into place. Ow. Fuck. Ow. Ow.

22.27 – Right shoulder falls out, again. Neck and head absolutely screaming. Food and morphine.

23.06 – Right wrist subluxes and sticks subluxed.

23.23 – Something terrible happens in my lower back. Intense need to vomit.

23.58 – Left shoulder has fallen out and downwards, and nothing will keep it in place. And not sleepy at all, due to the pain.

So, the totals are;

Jaw – 2

Shoulder girdle – 14

Wrists – 12

Fingers – 1

Ribs – 1

Hips – 4

Knees -1

Ankles -1

TOTAL – 36, that I’ve noticed, with times where I’ve had two or three at once (The classic reset-fall out-reset-fall out-reset and sodding stick this time combination) counted as one episode.

And now it’s midnight again, and that’s a fairly normal day in the life. Tomorrow, I plan to get for a swim at the free session at the pool tomorrow, and maybe work on my dolls’ house a bit. Yesterday was knackering because I bought a load of paint, basically.